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The Jesus Marriage

Tuesday, October 12, 2021 • Matt Loehr • Marriage Advice
Consider focusing on three things in order to have a Jesus Marriage.
The Jesus Marriage

What is a Jesus Marriage?

First, it’s a marriage that has issues. A marriage with two people who struggle with sin. A marriage that at times, seems
hopeless. The difference between a Jesus Marriage and all the rest…. is Jesus. He has the power and the insight to turn your marriage into something that seems impossible. It often starts with you, not your mate.


Consider focusing on three things in order to have a Jesus Marriage.


One: Follow Jesus
So many people believe in Jesus but they don’t follow him. They don’t read the bible enough to let His ways permeate their hearts and their thinking. 13 times Jesus said “follow me’’, which has a much different implication than the words  “believe in me”.

Sam just got home from work and ran into a buzz-saw of anger from his wife. “Sam, I told you to stop at the store and pick up some chicken. GREAT… now I am stuck and the Johnson’s are coming over and I won’t have dinner ready…. great job Sam.” She said sarcastically.

Sam had a whirlwind of thoughts pierce him like a sword. He was angry at himself for being forgetful, he was angry at her for being so rude and disrespectful and yet, he just left his bible study which focused on kindness towards others.

Sam took a breath and then asked Jesus to help him.

A few seconds later, he put his arms around his wife and asked for forgiveness for being forgetful. He then rushed to the store and acquired the chicken in time to save the evenings’ plans. As they crawled into bed later that night, his wife reached over tenderly and hugged him. “Sam, please forgive me for being so harsh.” He returned the affection as they fell asleep in each other’s arms.


What happened? Sam applied Jesus’ teaching to a real-life situation. The results helped all parties involved. His heart was softened, the meal wasn’t ruined and later his wife’s respect and appreciation was elevated. All because he applied Jesus to a moment in time.


Two: Apply His Word
As mentioned above, applying the bible to real-life situations is very difficult. Emotions are almost always in control of our lives and our speech. This is not a good thing. Emotions are not good or bad. They are simply a biological response to exterior circumstances. It’s ok to feel EVERY emotion you feel. What’s not ok is to act out every emotion. It’s not ok to let your emotions control your actions, your words or your heart. Applying Jesus’ words and the leading of His spirit is what makes a Christ-follower different from the world. If we don’t apply Jesus’ teaching to be kind, patient and peaceable with others, we are no different from the world. If we do not model His teaching to love those who hate us, hurt us and disappoint us, we are no different than the world.


Three: Be Patient
What a naughty word, patience. It doesn’t even look like it’s spelled correctly. It should be paishence. I must confess, being patient is not my strength. I must also confess that behind every failed relationship, failed verbal exchange or blunder on my part is impatience. How about you?

If we are to have a Jesus marriage, we must acquire a supernatural ability to be patient. Patient with our spouse, our kids, our co-workers, our boss, our neighbors and the list goes on and on. Social surroundings teach the opposite. In every category, we want things quicker, better, faster, nicer, cheaper, blah blah blah.

It all opposes Jesus teaching. No wonder we are a mess.

Give your spouse months or years to become more like Jesus. Model Jesus to your spouse before you confront them. Show your children how to love a person (spouse) like Jesus would. I discovered long ago that the top 10 people I admire in my life are all patient. NOT ONE of them are impatient. What does that say?


There you go. Become a JESUS marriage and see what happens.


When Jesus spoke again to the people, he said, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will never walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”  - John 8:12

Scriptures: John 8:12

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